Behold The Power Of Cheese
by S.K.Y4
Summary: This is what happens when you combine three authors, little sleep, and a lot of sugar. The rating is for language and implications. There are some usual and unusual pairing in here. R&R please!
1. Behold the Power of Cheese: Introduction

HIIIIYAAAA!!!!!! This fanfic is written by Sei, Ki, and Yanagi. A.K.A. SKY. This fic doesn't really have chapters. It is the fruit of no sleep for over twenty-four hours and much sugar. There will be the occasional translation for your convenience. I hope you enjoy this little tidbit of random insanity. Btw, the characters of Weiss Kruez belong to those that created such bishonen and not us. All other characters are ours. Btw, quotation marks are used to mark singing. 


	2. BHTPOC-Part 1

Behold the Power of Cheese  
  
*One day at the Koneko no Sumie Ie..........*  
  
Omi: There's cheese in the fridge.  
  
Ken: *gasp* Not the cheese!!!  
  
Omi: *nodnod* And.... It's...BRIE!!!!  
  
*Both run around in chibi mode*  
  
Aya: *heroic pose* We must fight the cheese!  
  
Brie: *just sits there*  
  
Youji: *looks in fridge* Ooh! CHEESE!!! *Eats the evil Brie. Cheese is defeated forever*  
  
THE STILTON CHEESE HIDING IN THE DARK RESESSES OF THE FRIDGE: You may have defeated the Brie but victory is mine! *Rampage, rampage*  
  
Youji: *chases after the stilton with a fondue fork* I shall make you into reclette!  
  
Omi: *taptap* Then why do you have a fondue fork?  
  
Youji: Oh. Right. *Chases after the stilton with a reclette set, which is quite heavy*  
  
Aya: *throws the fondue fork at a helicopter* TAKATORIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Stilton: Run, run as fast as you can! You can' catch me, I'm the stinky cheese man!! *Is caught be Ken*  
  
Ken: *puts the cheese into the garbage disposal and dusts off his hands* And that's the end of that chapter. 


	3. BHTPOC-Part 2

Stilton: I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! * Is eaten by Farf*  
  
Farf: *yumyumyum*  
  
Sei: Est-ce bien le bus pour Montpelier?  
  
Youji: Non, je suis un origniel.  
  
Omi: You're a moose?  
  
Youji: "I am the very image of a modern fanfic moose!"  
  
Minna: "He is the very image of a modern fanfic moose!"  
  
Youji: "Yes, I am the very-" Wait! I'm not a moose!  
  
Minna: *gasp*  
  
Youji: I'm.... I'm a....  
  
Omi: Please tell us Youji-kun!  
  
Youji: I'm...I'm a goat! *Hangs head*  
  
Aya: *gasp* You deceived me! You told me you were a moose!  
  
Youji: I know! *Sobs* I'm sorry!  
  
Aya: Now I can never trust you again. *Turns his back on the player*  
  
Youji: But.... Aya...I...I love you!!!!!! *Runs away sobbing*  
  
Aya...I'm sorry, Youji, but be never could've been together. I have someone...*tears*  
  
Youji: Who!?! *Sob* Another man?  
  
Aya: No. A woman. Her name is....  
  
Youji: Yes?  
  
Aya: Dammit! I can't lie to you. I love you Youji!  
  
Omi: Awwww......So sweet..........*cocks head*  
  
Shushu: *thinking hetai Schu thoughts* Hey Omi.... 


	4. BHTPOC-Part 3

Omi: *all innocent and kawaii* Hai?  
  
Schu: I- *is cut off*  
  
Nagi: RUN OMI-KUN! RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN!!!!!!  
  
Schu: Damn.........."Oh Fa~rfie....."  
  
Farf: Hai, Schu-chan? *Is answered with mental pictures of many possibilities......*  
  
Schu: "Follow me." *runs off somewhere with Farf for the rest of this fic*  
  
Ken: Omi? *blushes slightly*  
  
Omi: Hai Kenken? *Blushes and looks expectant*  
  
Ken: Well......  
  
Omi: Hai? *Clasps hands*  
  
Ken: Can I borrow twenty bucks for some manga?  
  
Omi: *facevault* Yeah........  
  
Bradley: ...Where's Schu?  
  
Nagi: .........Dunno  
  
Bradley: .......Okay  
  
Nagi: ........Sorry  
  
Bradley: ......Nice weather we've been having, eh?  
  
Nagi: ......Yeah. Way up there in the 80's  
  
Bradley: ......Quite nice  
  
Legolas: *pops out of nowhere* .......Waaaaaaait........What am I doing here?  
  
Nagi...A nice, sunny day....  
  
Schu: *pops out of nowhere* *glances at Legolas* Heeeeey there......  
  
Legolas: *sweatdrop* I've really got to be going..........*leaves* 


	5. BHTPOC-Part 4

Schu: *goes back to Farf*  
  
Bradley: *averts his eyes from Nagi's face* Nagi, I have something to tell you....  
  
Nagi: Hai, Bradders?  
  
Bradley: *shine* I love you Nagi-chan! *Kisses the telekinetic minor*  
  
Nagi: Oh Brad! *Shines* You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear those words from you! Now I'm not just some slutty bitch! *Tears*  
  
Schu: NO! BRADLEY, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!?!  
  
Bradley: But, don't you have Farfarello?  
  
Schu: Sorry. That was a reflex. *glomps his bitch, Farfie*  
  
Omi: *runs from all the hentai-ness* Get me out of this fiiiiiiiic!!!!  
  
Bert from Sesame Street: Croak  
  
Mr. Carrots: Ribbit  
  
Omi: AHHHHHH!!!!! HELP ME!!!!  
  
Ken: Omi! I'm coming! *Grabs Omi's hand* Don't ever let go!  
  
Omi: Oh, Ken! *the two glomp*  
  
Celeine Dion: *Titanic theme*  
  
Youji: *sniff* So......emotional.....*sniff*  
  
Legolas: *poof* WHAT THE ----------- AM I DOING HERE AGAIN!?!  
  
Youji: *row watching Moulin Rouge* "Gitchy gitchy ya ya......"  
  
Legolas: ..............Why me?  
  
Youji: If you don't like it here then leave! *the elf does so.* *Youji holds Aya when Cetine dies*  
  
THE KILLER COLBY CHEESE: BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!  
  
Aya: How dare you intrude upon our sappy moment! SHI-NE! *of course, has katana with* 


	6. BHTPOC-Translations

Est-ce bien le bus pour Montpelier? = is this the right bus to mount pelier?  
  
Non, je suis un origniel. = No, I am a moose.  
  
Koi = lover, boyfriend/girlfriend  
  
WAFF= warm and fuzzy feeling  
  
Hentai = perverted  
  
Kawaii = cute  
  
Hai = yes  
  
Manga = Japanese comics  
  
Shi-ne = die 


	7. BHTPOC-Part 5

Youji: Slice 'n' Dice!  
  
Aya: *slices 'n' dices* *random duck waddles in and eats the sliced 'n' diced cheese. It then leaves*  
  
Youji: Finally! *the two go back to their WAFF moment*  
  
Army of ducks: *march in*  
  
Head Duck: Quack!  
  
Legolas: *acting as translator* He says, Hand over your cheese...or else!  
  
Head Duck: Quack!  
  
Legolas: Every piece of Stilton, Mozzarella, and Parmesan shall be handed over!  
  
Youji: NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  
  
Aya: Koi, all the cheese we have seen so far has been evil. Let's just hand it over.  
  
Youji: *not able to resist Aya in any way* Fine. For you, koi.   
  
Nagi: *floats all the Stilton, Mozzarella, and Parmesan to the ducks. The ducks leave* Now will you leave me and Bradders ALONE!?!  
  
Omi: *is traumatized by the ducks* Ken-kuuuuuuuuuuuuun..........  
  
Ken: "Don't worry, be happy now! Doo doo doo........"  
Weiss: *forms a kick line* "give my regards to Broadwaaaay, remember me to Harold's Square......."  
Schwartz: *tap dancing* I'm siiiiiiinging in the cheese, just-"  
Bradley: Wait!  
Nagi: The lyrics are wrong!  
  
Farf: *twitches at the cheese*  
  
Schu: *grabs Farf and brings him back to their 'spot'* Have fun destroying cheese without us!  
  
Ken: *holds Omi* It's okay. Those evil ducks are gone. *glares at authors* They won't be back. Hopefully.... 


	8. BHTPOC-Part 6

Omi: Okay. Ken? Can I have some cheddar cheese?  
  
Ken: Okay.  
  
CHEDDAR CHEESE: *can't move but is scared out of mind if possible*  
  
Omi: *eats cheese, which turns out to be the most evil of the cheese left and was plotting world domination* Hm. Not bad. A little mild though.  
  
CHEDDAR CHEESE: What!?! I'm the evil cheese! I can't be 'not bad'!  
  
Ken: Huh.   
  
Schu: HELLO! AND WELCOM TO THE SCHWARTZ COOKING SHOW!!! Today...we will be making grilled cheese sanwitches! First.....  
  
Farf: We microwave the cheese!!!! *shoves the Kraft cheese in the microwave on 'high'*  
  
Schu: Um...somehow I tink there was supposed to be bread somewhere in there...and no plastic wrapper...  
  
Farf: DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE!!!!!!!!  
  
Schu: Right then......Braddikins, howya doin'?  
  
Bradley:......*recalling tragic memories* The....the Kraft cheese....it...it...  
  
Schu: ?  
  
Bradley: ......IT WAS ORANGE!!!!!!!!!! *breaks down in hysterical sobbing*  
  
Nagi: Bradders! *wraps arms around the american* SCHULDICH!!! What did you do to my Bradders!?!  
  
Schu: N-nothing....  
  
Nagi: *throws Schu out a window*  
  
Farf: SHUSHU!!!!!!!! *goes for Nagi's throat* DIE!!!! IT WILL HURT GOD!!!!!!  
  
Nagi: *brings Schu back unharmed* There! Don't hurt me!  
  
Farf: *is much calmer glomps onto Schu and murmurs into his ear* Schuschu......  
  
Nagi: *comforts his Bradders and destroys the Kraft cheese* 


	9. BHTPOC-Part 7

Aya: I LIKE TRAFFIC LIGHTS!!!!!!  
  
Minna: .......  
  
Aya: .........  
  
Minna: ......  
  
Legolas: *the very descruntled elf appears* THAT'S IT!!!!!! *goes a-author huntin'*  
  
Youji: Aya, koi, maybe you should come sit with me.....*they made for the couch, saw Ken and Omi making out, and changed course to god knows where.*  
  
Schu: *takes knife from Farfie* Koi, don't hurt yourself anymore, okay?  
  
Farf: Only if I can keep hurting god by eating this Monteray Jack!  
  
Schu: Okay.  
  
Monterey Jack: *cossack dances*   
  
Schu: But wait......it's soooooo cute....*stuggles with self for a bit* Farfie, I'm sorry but-*elopes with the Monterey Jack*  
  
Farf: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!  
  
Schu: *breaks the hold of the evil cheese* I WILL NOT HURT/BETRAY MY FARFIE!!!! *glomps onto Farf and holds him very close*  
  
Monterey Jack: But...but...*tears welling up*  
  
Schu: Farf...Monterey...Farf...Monterey...Farf...I CAN'T DECIDE! I LOVE YOU BOTH!!!!!! *glomps both*  
  
Farf and MJ: *glaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaare*  
  
MJ: *drops dead*  
  
Schu: Oh well. FARFIE!!!!!!!!  
  
Farf: SCHUSCHU!!!!!!  
  
Schu: Farf! *glomps*  
  
Farf: Schu! *glomps* 


	10. BHTPOC-Part 8

Ken: "I wanna be your dog..."  
  
Omi: "I wanna be your dog..."  
  
Brad: *pokes dead cheese with a stick*  
  
Omi: NOOOOO......not a stick. A spork. *pokes the cheese with a spork*  
  
Dead Cheese: *magically becomes the spork fairy* I am the sparkley spork fairy! *giggle*  
  
Minna: ........  
  
Farf: "The hills are aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiive........"  
  
Schu: "With the sound of muuuuuuuuuuuuusic......" 


End file.
